It’s the summer of 1987, and James Brennan (Jesse Eisenberg), an uptight, recent college grad, can’t wait to embark on his dream tour of Europe. But when his parents announce they can no longer subsidize his trip, James has little choice but to take a lowly job at a local amusement park. Forget about German beer, world-famous museums, and cute French girls—James’ summer will now be populated by belligerent dads, stuffed pandas, and screaming kids high on cotton candy. Lucky for James, what should be his worst summer ever turns into quite an adventure when he discovers love in the most unlikely place.  It’s here that he meets a whole cast of quirky members!  There’s the uber-cool but sleazy handy man played by Ryan Reynolds, the weird looking love interest (Kristen Stewart), the weird couple that run Adventureland (Bill Hader, Kristen Wiig), and so on.

***SPOILER ALERT*** Read no further if you don’t want hints about the ending.

There was only a squint of Mottola’s ultra-funny directing style in Adventureland.  There were definitely laugh-out-loud moments, I won’t deny that.  But search as you might, there’s not much more to this film than a better-than-average romantic comedy.  And when I say better-than-average, I mean funnier.  Because really, the movie is about shitty people doing shitty things to each other in shitty places.  And while Mattola (who also wrote the script) tried to sum things up at the very end by allowing the two lead people (who aren’t nice, or interesting people) to finally consummate their relationship, it’s just not satisfying.  Oh, and believing Kristen Stewart could be an NYU student is a mighty big pill to swallow.  In my mind, she should still be offering herself to vampires at the prom.   You’ll laugh, mostly at Hader and Wiig, but Mottola lowered his own bar here.  At least you can look forward to a bitchin’ 80s soundtrack.

2.5 out of 4 stars

Now, I haven’t read the books.  And I’m going to keep it that way.  I’m very disappointed in some of my male friends and family members who have given in to female, significant others and sold out (let’s see those same female significant others read Fight Club).  I won’t risk a synopsis here, for fear of making some mistake and having devout Twilight fans lash out at me.  But I’ll say it’s a cheesy romance story between a boring teenage girl (Kristen Stewart) and a hunky vampire that can’t seem to stay away from her.

I laughed out loud multiple times during the movie.  So did the nearly packed theater, full of dreamy-eyed, giggly girls.  I’m concerned it wasn’t supposed to be as funny as it was.  Director Catherine Hardwicke has proven to be an uneven director, with her previous films including Lords of Dogtown, and Thirteen.  As with both of those movies, there are some interesting moments, and a whole lot of uninteresting, self-indulgent ones.  With Twilight, there was more of the latter.  And it made for one lame-ass movie.  Unless you’re a die hard fan of the novels (and let me be clear, I’m passing no judgement on the books since I haven’t read them), you’ll be sorely disappointed by this dull story that will make you cry of boredom and tremble with disdain before its two whole hours are up.  For the love of God, skip this.

1 out of 4 stars

Rottentomatoes: 43% - Cream of the Crop: 58%