Bitchin' Film Reviews

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The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

August 7th, 2008 by Blake

This movie blows. I’m embarassed I paid $8.25 to see it. I’m embarassed I invited a good friend, and my brother-in-law. Admittedly, we went for the sole purpose of poking fun, but nevertheless…  I’m embarassed for Brendan Fraiser and Jet Li’s CGI-ed face that morphs into a three headed dragon, and even more embarassed for the yetis representing Jesus taking mortally wounded Fraiser to a pool of magical water where a bath (or baptism-you say tomato, I say toe-mah-toe) saves his life.

The most entertaining part of this movie is that people actually don’t understand why Rachel Weisz didn’t reprise her role for this third installment. Hahahhahahahahahah.

Don’t go see this movie. Go see Mamma Mia, or that movie about girls that share pants.

Bitchin' Stars: ☆☆☆☆

Rottentomatoes: 9%Cream of the Crop: 10%

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4 responses so far ↓

  • I love the layout of your blog!

    It’s so classy.

  • All I needed with the first sentence. (No, wait. All I needed was the trailer.)

    Still, this movie is going to make decent money. Why do you think all the people go to see all the crappy movies?

  • I was kind of surprised that someone could think of a third Mummy movie, wait, are there more? I have lost track. Your site is great! Love what you’ve done with the place. :)

  • I’m sure it’s not Sundance, but it’s pretty fun and interesting. Of course, I’m not really a movie critic and kind of go for the entertainment value. At any rate, I believe it’s the first week of August each year. I ended up with VIP passes this year, so check with me next year.