Twilight, as a movie, is a joke. Literally. It’s hilarious. But I don’t think it’s supposed to be. If you can’t find cash to see this film you can look into payday loans or wait till this hits the dollar theater and just save the money. It’s actually kind of insulting to the women who fall all over themselves for Edward Cullen (Robert Pattison who’s apparently come into his own since a brief stint as Cederic Diggory in the Harry Potter series). This is clearly a vapid, poorly constructed story, that doesn’t have much appeal except that women fawn all over it because they wish the handsome, bad boy would risk his life and break all the rules for them.
Now, I haven’t read the books. And I’m going to keep it that way. I’m very disappointed in some of my male friends and family members who have given in to female, significant others and sold out (let’s see those same female significant others read Fight Club). I won’t risk a synopsis here, for fear of making some mistake and having devout Twilight fans lash out at me. But I’ll say it’s a cheesy romance story between a boring teenage girl (Kristen Stewart) and a hunky vampire that can’t seem to stay away from her.
I laughed out loud multiple times during the movie. So did the nearly packed theater, full of dreamy-eyed, giggly girls. I’m concerned it wasn’t supposed to be as funny as it was. Director Catherine Hardwicke has proven to be an uneven director, with her previous films including Lords of Dogtown, and Thirteen. As with both of those movies, there are some interesting moments, and a whole lot of uninteresting, self-indulgent ones. With Twilight, there was more of the latter. And it made for one lame-ass movie. Unless you’re a die hard fan of the novels (and let me be clear, I’m passing no judgement on the books since I haven’t read them), you’ll be sorely disappointed by this dull story that will make you cry of boredom and tremble with disdain before its two whole hours are up. For the love of God, skip this.